Tuesday, February 22, 2005
The Greatest Game in the World
Graduate level business education can be an ardious task (well....not really). Just like any other "grown-ups" people in the Rollins College AMBA 8 program got sick of each other. We decided that there was a need to quantify the moronic behavior that was ever so prevalent among our classmates. So was born unto the Earth...Fantasy AMBA. The concept was brillant!!! The gane worked just like Fantasy Football. You picked players (classmates in our case) and each of those players earned you points based on their actions (or quirks in our case). I am not going to mention any names, but here are the official actions that earned you points. I would post the scoring spreadsheet, but it was so in depth that I might crash this site. The formatting was a bit ruined in translation, but you can figure it out on your own.
BYLAWS FOR AMBA FANTASY LEAGUE – CONSTITUTION OF POINTS
POINT EARNING ACTION OFFICIAL EXPLANATION
Comments with no relevance to discussion The speaking-just-to-speak rule. Includes any comments that do not make a significant addition to the learning experience. Also referred to as the “My cat’s name is Mittens” clause.
Crying There must be actual tears. Lip quivering, flush face, and excessive blinking have been deemed unacceptable and will not earn any points. Points will be earned if subject leaves the room to cry (must be witnessed by at least 2 people).
Shouting The voice must be raised above standard conversational tone and be used to convey anger, disgust or hatred.
Embarrassing/Personal stories This includes anything stories that should only surface after a long night of drinking. This also includes any stories that reveal nicknames revolving around the poultry industry.
Sucking up Includes not only obvious compliments to an individual, but starting any controversial sentence with “I just want to start by saying that I thing this class/article/topic is important…”.
Offending individual The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets another individual and has not been made in a joking manner.
Offending entire demographic group The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets any demographic group who share similar characteristics (see Kotler’s book Marketing Management for a detailed definition of “demographic”).
Offending 50% of class The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets at least 18 students but not more than 30 (see below).
Offending entire class The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets at least 31 people in class.
Fisticuffs in class Points will be awarded for any attempt at physical harm towards another person as defined by the tort of assault. (Note: the generic definition for assault will be used in this case and NOT assault as defined by Florida state law). Assault is defined as the threat of immediate harm or offensive contact or any action that arouses reasonable apprehension of imminent harm; actual physical contact is unnecessary (Cheeseman, Business Law, 2001, Prentice hall)
Fisticuffs outside of class See above-the only difference is that this must occur outside the threshold of the assigned classroom.
Nit-picking Any comments that do not add value to the educational experience and have not yet been mentioned.
Summarizing or adding to someone else’s point We already heard it once, it probably wasn’t worthwhile to begin with, we definitely don’t need it repeated or summarized.
Any reference to CRM/Germany/repetitive point We are here to acquire a plethora of skills and knowledge, hearing repetitive stories does not add to the educational experience.
Reply all OK, there were rules laid out in the middle of the summer. Stick to the rules and no one gets any points.
Brown stamps See the article on Transactional Analysis for a full explanation – at least you can apply something you learned.
Body odor This is Florida, there is PLENTY of water for everyone…USE IT! We are all adults here, hopefully no one will get points for this.
Bad breath See above.
Excessive body language Points will be awarded only for body language that is excessive beyond what is culturally acceptable for the person using the body language (so as not to discriminate).
Inability to convey point If no one can really understand what the hell you are trying to say (note: no points will be awarded for miscommunication/misunderstandings due to language barriers).
Professor “moves on” Points will be awarded when the professor does not even acknowledge the drivel that is being spewed from the offender’s mouth.
Professor is visibly confused Same as above except the professor takes the time to ask what the hell the person was trying to say.
Every question after the second in the same class Do the math – 37 students, 2 questions each…that’s a lot. Limit the questions to 2 per person. Anymore than 2 entails either sucking up or plain stupidity.
Cell phone rings in class Points are only awarded if the phone rings during the scheduled hours of the class (before and after don’t count). Points will also be awarded if people can still hear the phone vibrate.
Obvious stupidity Any comments that make us dumber after we hear them.
Spontaneous outbursts of profanity At least one of the seven original curse words (as defined by George Carlin) must be clearly stated.
Overused taglines What’s going on? Enough said.
Obvious poor fashion Must go beyond wrinkles and stains. The class fashion consultants (Kat and Christa) will make the official calls.
Late for class More than 5 minutes to earn any points.
Audible random noises Includes mumbling, laugh-grunting, desk smacking, and any other non-word noises.
BYLAWS FOR AMBA FANTASY LEAGUE – CONSTITUTION OF POINTS
POINT EARNING ACTION OFFICIAL EXPLANATION
Comments with no relevance to discussion The speaking-just-to-speak rule. Includes any comments that do not make a significant addition to the learning experience. Also referred to as the “My cat’s name is Mittens” clause.
Crying There must be actual tears. Lip quivering, flush face, and excessive blinking have been deemed unacceptable and will not earn any points. Points will be earned if subject leaves the room to cry (must be witnessed by at least 2 people).
Shouting The voice must be raised above standard conversational tone and be used to convey anger, disgust or hatred.
Embarrassing/Personal stories This includes anything stories that should only surface after a long night of drinking. This also includes any stories that reveal nicknames revolving around the poultry industry.
Sucking up Includes not only obvious compliments to an individual, but starting any controversial sentence with “I just want to start by saying that I thing this class/article/topic is important…”.
Offending individual The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets another individual and has not been made in a joking manner.
Offending entire demographic group The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets any demographic group who share similar characteristics (see Kotler’s book Marketing Management for a detailed definition of “demographic”).
Offending 50% of class The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets at least 18 students but not more than 30 (see below).
Offending entire class The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets at least 31 people in class.
Fisticuffs in class Points will be awarded for any attempt at physical harm towards another person as defined by the tort of assault. (Note: the generic definition for assault will be used in this case and NOT assault as defined by Florida state law). Assault is defined as the threat of immediate harm or offensive contact or any action that arouses reasonable apprehension of imminent harm; actual physical contact is unnecessary (Cheeseman, Business Law, 2001, Prentice hall)
Fisticuffs outside of class See above-the only difference is that this must occur outside the threshold of the assigned classroom.
Nit-picking Any comments that do not add value to the educational experience and have not yet been mentioned.
Summarizing or adding to someone else’s point We already heard it once, it probably wasn’t worthwhile to begin with, we definitely don’t need it repeated or summarized.
Any reference to CRM/Germany/repetitive point We are here to acquire a plethora of skills and knowledge, hearing repetitive stories does not add to the educational experience.
Reply all OK, there were rules laid out in the middle of the summer. Stick to the rules and no one gets any points.
Brown stamps See the article on Transactional Analysis for a full explanation – at least you can apply something you learned.
Body odor This is Florida, there is PLENTY of water for everyone…USE IT! We are all adults here, hopefully no one will get points for this.
Bad breath See above.
Excessive body language Points will be awarded only for body language that is excessive beyond what is culturally acceptable for the person using the body language (so as not to discriminate).
Inability to convey point If no one can really understand what the hell you are trying to say (note: no points will be awarded for miscommunication/misunderstandings due to language barriers).
Professor “moves on” Points will be awarded when the professor does not even acknowledge the drivel that is being spewed from the offender’s mouth.
Professor is visibly confused Same as above except the professor takes the time to ask what the hell the person was trying to say.
Every question after the second in the same class Do the math – 37 students, 2 questions each…that’s a lot. Limit the questions to 2 per person. Anymore than 2 entails either sucking up or plain stupidity.
Cell phone rings in class Points are only awarded if the phone rings during the scheduled hours of the class (before and after don’t count). Points will also be awarded if people can still hear the phone vibrate.
Obvious stupidity Any comments that make us dumber after we hear them.
Spontaneous outbursts of profanity At least one of the seven original curse words (as defined by George Carlin) must be clearly stated.
Overused taglines What’s going on? Enough said.
Obvious poor fashion Must go beyond wrinkles and stains. The class fashion consultants (Kat and Christa) will make the official calls.
Late for class More than 5 minutes to earn any points.
Audible random noises Includes mumbling, laugh-grunting, desk smacking, and any other non-word noises.
# posted by The Professor @ 8:33 PM 
