On the first day of my summer vacation...

26 July 2006

2006-07-26T04:42:00.000-07:00

One day rest after our Mt. Washington experience and Tracy and I are at it again (by rest I mean that we spend 5 hours in the car and 2 hours in town walking around). Monday we had a nice 5.7 mile run along the carriage roads (packed gravel, no cars allowed) followed by a brutal 5 mile hike. The weather and trail conditions were perfect and we wound up summiting 3 differrent mountains in 1 hike. We came home after that and got drunk at dinner at an amazing vegitarian restaurant (I am slowly transforming Tracy).

On Tuesday we did another 5.5 mile run on the carriage roads (different route) we were a bit tired from Monday so we had to walk a couple times. The route we chose was much hillier than we wanted. We followed that run with another brutal 11 mile hike where we summited another 3 mountains. We experienced flashbacks of our Mt Washington hike during most of the day as the weather consisted of high winds and thick fog. we covered the entire hike in a bit over 5 hours.

We had a total of 10 hours of traiing over the past 2 days. Vacation is sooooo much fun :-) !!!!!!!

Saturday 22 July

2006-07-25T06:04:00.000-07:00

Today’s entry is being coauthored by Tracy to ensure that I get all the details correct and especially so I don’t embellish the facts. We would first like to say that putting yesterday’s hike into words will never do it any type of justice. You will most likely just hear that “John, Teresa, Tracy, Adam, and Lauren went on a long hike”…that couldn’t be further from the truth. To fully appreciate our experience first tie your shoes REALLY tight, then punch yourself in the legs numerous times, follow that with a quick drenching with water and sit there for 12 hours…now multiply that by 100. Soon you will understand…

The day started out great. Up early (5:30), breakfast of yogurt with granola, some organic bread and LOTS of coffee. Then Adam, Lauren and I piled in the truck. Yes, all three in Adams little truck…sitting on the hump is not pretty. The ride to the mountain took us 1.5 hours. Once there we ran into John and Teresa. We double check out route with a information guide hit the head and off we went. The day was looked great for a hike and we all started out with upbeat spirits laughing and chatting. We chose to take the Tuckerman Ravine Trail which is the most popular summit trail. It’s popularity stems from its amazing views and its high level of maintenance. Despite its popularity the hike challenges even the most experienced hikers with its near constant steep accents.

The hike started out nearly perfect as the weather was overcast and cool. We stopped about .5 miles into the hike to take some pictures of an amazing waterfall that cascades nearly 200 feel through a ravine. Our next stop was at the first hut (an actual house built on the summit trail) where we stopped to use the bathroom (Adam still peed in the woods) refill our water (with an old fashioned hand primed water pump) and eat (most of us brought normal food but Adam tried to survive the entire day on organic spirulina…that’s green algae – that is what we brought for Tracy also….I would not eat it!!)

From the hut we continued to push for the summit through some amazing views of mountain vistas and waterfalls. The trail because extremely technical in many places and we were actually required to climb on our hands and knees over boulders the size of houses (this is known as an “unassisted class-3 scramble” for any of you mountaineers). The next piece of knowledge you should know is that Adam and Teresa are more or less intimidated by heights, the type of person does not want to look down. This wasn’t helped by the fact that John had to catch a young kid from almost taking a header a few hundred feet down a waterfall.

The last .5 mile to the summit was the most difficult (up to this point). You can actually see the summit buildings and the sign said “Summit .4 miles”…that half mile took us nearly an hour to complete…it felt like the summit kept moving further and further up. The hike here is more like boulder hopping, or scavenging from rock to rock. It is all above the tree line. Fog had started to roll in, along with a little wind. Our first injury of the day happened here. Teresa, while being ever so careful to watch where her feet went, ran head first into a rock. I saw it jump up in front of her!!! But that give you an idea of how steep the climb was, as you are standing there the rocks in front of you to climb are at eye level. We had passed (and been passed) by a good bit of folks on the way up, the trail was having a busy day. There was a fund raiser for the observation tower going on along with the “Sea-to-Summit” triathlon.

Alas we finally made it, to the parking lot of the summit, quite interesting to do all that climbing and come out in a parking lot. The visitor center at the top was packed! Many “normal” folks come up via the bus, cog railway or drive themselves. We stayed at the top for about an hour, having some food, buying some souvenirs (They only sell them at the top, what a racket) and just resting.

However, while we were resting at the top, weather blew in…..before we left the top a drizzle had started, we were all bundled against the cold and ready to tackle the arduous decent. We knew we were going to be in for a difficult decent because the rocks were already wet and slippery and the fog eliminated any changes of seeing more than 50 feet in front of you. Did we mention the driving wind and freezing rain yet in addition to everything else? We all decided to take a different route down so we wouldn’t have to brave the steep cliffs on the Tuckerman Ravine Trail…our knees would all come to regret this decision. The trail we decide on was called Boott Spurr. This was a MUCH less traveled (hence MUCH less maintained) trail. It also didn’t provide any cover from the driving wind and rain since it traveled across the top of a ridge that was above the tree line. The fog was so bad at this point that we had to navigate from rock cairn to rock cairn. Numbness and near hypothermia started to set in for most of us since we were all soaked from head to toe. The trail only got worse from there…

Once we hit the tree line (seemingly hours later) the trail became more difficult because it was nothing more than a stream bed that flowed down the side of the mountain. Of course the stream bed became an untamed torrent of rapids due to all the rain. Our feet were soaked from walking through this muck. The trail was also MUCH steeper and MUCH rockier than the first and our pace through the woods was slowed to a 120 MINUTE MILE!!!!!! This part of the hike saw all of us go through the entire range of emotions. Teresa was getting a bit frustrated from falling so much (we all know how much she falls on flat concrete…so imaging steep wet rocks, Tracy started hallucinating from hypothermia, John was just normal calm John, and Adam/Lauren somehow managed to giggle uncontrollably all the way down). The most difficult part of this hike was the ladder. We all came to a man made log ladder that descended nearly 20 feet down a sheer rock face…this was not an obstacle that we were ready to manage…unfortunately we didn’t really have a choice in the matter.

We somehow all managed to make it to the bottom alive…broken; but alive. We changed out of our wet clothes as best we could and all went out for a much deserved pizza and beer. The ride back in Adam’s truck was painful because it was dark and rainy and Lauren, Tracy, and Adam all smelled pretty bad.

We can’t wait to do it again next year…

2006-07-20T07:52:00.000-07:00

I neven was one for taking a lot of recvery time. Yesterday (2 days after my race) I biked for 2 hours in the morning, hiked for 3 hours in the afternoon (VERY steep with 2 summits) and swam for an hour in the evening. I didn't eat as well as I should have and I kind of feel it today. Off for a long ride today (after I finish watching The Tour). It's nice not having to start early in the morning to beat the heat. I am super excited about this weekend's climb with Tracy, Teresa, and John.

17 July 2006

2006-07-17T17:58:00.000-07:00

The race this weekend was an absolute blast!!! The director did an amazing job at putting together an entire weekend full of events as well as a top notch race. I stayed in the dorms on the campus of Hobart and William Smith Colleges right in downtown Geneva. The last time I stayed in dorms was in undergrad and I got thrown out my first year...I did a much better job of folllowing rules this time. Here is a brief overview of the race day:
MORNING - Woke up at 4:30 and drank my Tim Horton's coffee...that make some of the best coffee in the world...the Canadians really know their java. I decided to bike the 3 miles to the race venue which served as a nice warm up. I would come to regret this decision after the race.
SWIM - The swim took place in one of the finger lakes...very nice and clear. Unfortunately the water got very rough due to the wind, the boats, and the shallow depth. I got tossed around pretty good on the leg that went parallel to the shore. The exit was brutal becasue you had to walk almost 100 yards through knee high water...too shallow to swim and extremely taxing to run through. The swim took me about 40 minutes.
BIKE - This was my first race on the new bike and it was quite a difference. I was definitely able to climb better and shoot the hills quicker. My legs also felt quite a bit better at the end of the ride than they ever did on my tri bike. The course was ver scenic as it rolled through farms and vinyards. There was very little traffic and the roads were all very smooth and VERY hilly. The bike took me a bit over 3 hours (the results haven't been posted yet). I also may have received a penalty on the bike...the USAT guy was following me and I saw him write something down. I had plenty of room in front of me, but ever since Sarasota I think USAT has it out for me.
RUN - I was surprised how good I felt off the bike. I was able to run all but about 2 of the 13 miles. It was very hot on the run and it HURT. The temp reached about 96 with high humidity on no clouds. The run course was also brutally hilly. There were some serious quarter mile climbs at numerous sections. There were lots of homeowners along the course who had their hoses out and they were spraying down the runners...this was a great help between the aid stations. The run took me about 2.5 hours.
AFTERMATH - I pretty much collapsed in the grass as soon as I was done. The medical tent at the end looked like a scene from MASH. There were bodies EVERYWHERE...they filled up all the cots they had and they were putting people on picnic tables and on te ground. I guess New Englanders can't take the heat ;-) Riding my bike 3 miles uphill back to my dorm room absolutely sucked!!!! I managed to take a shower and couldnt move out of my bed. My electrolytes were seriously depleted and I had no easy way of getting food since my car was parked a half mile away. I finally grabbed some chips and soda from the snack machine. That gave me enough energy to go get dinner which consisted of a stromboli, 1 lb of pineapple and 3 doughnuts.

So now I get one day of rest until I can start getting ready for the Mt Washington summit next weekend.

14 July 2005

2006-07-13T18:55:00.000-07:00

This is my last update for a while as I am heading over to New York tomorrow morning and I won't be back here until Monday evening. I'm definitely looking forward to the race there...the weather is supposed to be perfect; high 70's to low 80's during the race and very low humidity. I got a bunch of stuff for my new bike today; SPD clips, straight aero bars, and a shorter stem. All of that cost less than $150...it's definitely nice having a Trek rep in the family. I spent the entire afternoon and evening making bike fit modification on the new ride...I think I have it at a place that will be relatively comfortable for 56 miles of rolling hills.

I'm out...talk to you all soon :-)

12 July 2006

2006-07-13T04:56:00.000-07:00

Lauren and I went to the masters swim at Plymouth State again last night. Out workout was 2K but I only managed 1.8K and Lauren only managed about 1.5K. It wasn't becasue we were tired (I could use the excuse that I was tapering), we didn't finish the workout because we were goofing off too much in the pool. I found it fun to grab her foot and pull her backwards in mid stroke. She found it fun to smack me in the head everytime we passed each other. So basically nothing has changed in the past 25 years becasue this is the same stuff we did when we were kids. My mom was right...the Gifford kids should never be allowed out in public togehter.

I also used the giant fins for my kicking sets...they were fun becasue you really fly through the water with minimal effort. Now to find a way to sneak them into the lake this weekend for my race.

11 July 2006

2006-07-11T19:44:00.000-07:00

So I have always told people that I have a really good sense of direction. Apparently I have been lying all these years...tonight is a great example of that. I headed out on the bike for a quick 30 minute ride (part of my alleged taper) but I kept finding cool roads to go down (ALL the roads here are void of traffic so they are great for riding). I soon came to realize that my 30 minutes were up and I was lost. It was also getting dark, I didn't have my cell phone with me, and I had no idea how to get in touch with my sister for help. I wasa getting a bit nervous becasue these roads are NOT the place you want to be lost in the dark; so I began to really hammer on the bike hoping that I would see something that I recognized. I finally made it back to the house before dark and my 30 minute ride became a 2 hour epic journey through central New Hampshire. I guess this is just karma for always making fun of those people who wear GPS units on their wrist for every workout ;-)

Here is a link for the race I am doing in New York this weekend www.musselmantri.com so Bev can make sure that the race is legit :-P

10 July 2006

2006-07-10T18:17:00.000-07:00

So I got my Madone 5.9 this weekend and I absolutely LOVE it!!! Road bikes are so much more comfortable than tri bikes...especially when they only weigh 15 pounds. I did a killer ride today through the White Mountain National Forrest. The ride took me over the Kangamangus Highway and it was basically 1.5 hours straight of low gear climbing followed by 30 minutes of near-death downhill. I wanted to go up the road furthur but it got too cold (I know...pity me). Tonight I did a masters swim with Lauren (sister) and Matt Boobar at the Plymouth State University pool. It was nice becuase the Plymouth State swimming coach runs the workout and she helped my out quite a bit with my stroke. At some point this week I should probably start my taper since my big race in New York is this Saturday.

So I have something to confess...if I don't confess it now then it will be confessed for me by someone who's name rhymes with Tracy. I decided to see what it was like to shave my legs. Julie did say this can be my summer of experimentation and since the drug days are behind me I do things like shave. It felt like it helped with my swimming but I may just be imagining things. Everything will be grown back before I return so no one will notice anything different.

9 July 2006

2006-07-09T18:39:00.000-07:00

I fell in love this weekend...more on that later.

6 July 2006

2006-07-06T18:28:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was my first day off of training in almost 2 weeks. Lauren (sister) and I went to Hanover, NH for the day. She had some stuff to do for school there (she goes to Dartmouth) so I walked around campus and town for the afternoon. Dartmouth is definitely one of the nicest campuses in the country. I also noted that there are no fat people in the entire town of Hanover...everyone there is super fit and every car has a bike/kayak rack. Today Lauren and I hung out with her friend Gordon who is somewhat of a local celebrity (well, at least in is own mind). We did some hiking in the White Mountains and then ate lunch at a cool place in the small mountain town of Bethlehem. Gordon went to high school with the olympic skiier, Bodie Miller so he took us on the "What Would Bodie Do" tour of the town that he grew up in. After that we went home and I biked 30 miles. I wanted to do a relaxing ride because my calves are still sore from my mega-hike. Unfortunately there are no easy rides around here because I'm in the middle of the mountains so my easy ride becasue a 2.5 hour hammer fest up endless hills. I may be doing a tri in VT this weekend with Matt Boobar (Lauren's boyfriend's roomate). He is a professional Xterra (off road triathlon) racer who will most likely win the elite division. I'm gonna try to get him drunk the night before to even the field a bit (I learned that trick from Tracy).

4 July 2006

2006-07-04T14:57:00.000-07:00

Lots has happened since my last update...and, yes, I already got the lecture from Tracy for not updating more. Yesterday I completed the grand mother of all workouts. It's called the Presidential Traverse and it is considered to be the most difficult hike in the east. The trail takes you 20 miles over the highest mountain range in New England. You cover 7 different summits with a total of 9000 feet of elevation gain. The entire hike took me a bit over 11 hours and it was pure hell. The trail is either really steep uphill or really steel downhill over over extremely large rocks. I spent almost half the day on all fours trying to scrable over the scree fields (common above the tree line). I would try to describe the pain that I was in when I was done but I don't want to be known as a delicate flower :-) My iron distance race is October now seems a bit easier...

I planed on just staying in bed today but I wound up going kayaking and swimming for 3 hours this morning. We were on the lake that the movie "On Golden Pond" was filmed on.

Things I have received since I have been home:
1 bike rack for my truck
1 new bike helmet
1 Timex running shirt
1 Timex visor
1 Timex watch
1 pair Timex warmup pants
(my sister's boyfriend has a bunch of free Timex stuff from a joint promo that they did with Trek)

29 June 2006

2006-06-29T18:50:00.000-07:00

I swam 2K in the seventh ring of hell today. The first 1K wasn't bad as I had the entire pool to myself. Then the summer camp showed up. It was like I was living the lost chapter of Dante's Inferno. The kids were having a contest to see who could scream the loudest...loads of fun in the indoor pool. I also did some weights when I was finished the swim. The weight room at the Y here is a complete crap hole. On the brighter side I did pick up a bike rack for my truck. Now I look like I actually know what I'm doing.

28 June 2006

2006-06-28T18:38:00.000-07:00

There is a great biking trail that starts about 5 miles from my dad's house and travels 30 miles into downtown Philadelphia. It travels through Valley Forge National Park and it was pretty cool to see all the old shacks that housed dozens of troops...it reminded me of Apopka. I made it about 10 miles down the trail only to find that it was flooded out. The flooding of the Delaware River (commomly referred to as the Smell-aware River) was really bad as they had almost 15 inches of rain here in the past 4 days. It was kind of freaky seeing all the houses along the trail under water. I felt bad for a while until I remembered that I was on vacation, so I stopped caring. I would up riding about 22 miles total. I was going to run tonight but I got lazy and decided to take Dad on in a game of Trivial Pursuit. We are about evenly matched, but I let him win tonight.

27 June 2006

2006-06-27T16:38:00.000-07:00

Apparently it has been raining here for the past 6 days. I forgot that rain in the north east never stops like it does in Florida. Anyway I got in a quick swim at the Y right by my dad's house. The Y itself is pretty dumpy, but they had 6 different pools which was kind of nice. The pool was quite possibly the coldest pool that I have ever swam in. The temperature was 71...that's right, the indoor pool was wetsuit legal. I never quite got used to the water and wound up only doing 1.2K. The showers in the mens locker room were some kind of cruel joke. They all stemmed from a pillar in the middle of the room so when you were showering you had to look at everyone else who was showering as well. I hope I don't catch gay.

25 June 2006

2006-06-27T16:29:00.000-07:00

The drive up here can only be described as pure hell. Perhaps something similar to a barbed wire cathater. It usually takes me 16 hours to complete the 1000 mile trip door-to-door. This time, however, it took me 19 hours...that's a 52.634 mph pace. Apparently I timed it perfectly so I would:
1. Leave when I was exhausted from training, sleep deprivation, and the party at Tracy's (she denied me my much needed afternoon nap).
2. Hit every rainstorm on the East coast.
3. Hit rush hour in Washington (that's DC for the geographically impared).
The first sign that I left too early was the fact that I had to pull over for a quick nap before I was even out of Florida!!!!

On a completely random note, a man tried to sell me live bait in the McDonalds parking lot at 5:39 in the morning somewhere in central Georgia. By live bait I realy hope he was talking about night crawlers and not the hooker he had ties up in the back of his van.

Boycotts are for the economically illiterate

2006-05-01T20:12:00.000-07:00

My inbox has been filled with moronic "solutions" to the recent spike in gas prices. Like most people who work in a place that has a "Reply All" button on their email I am sick of hearing the droning masses who believe that this stuff will work. Luckily I have the title of "Economist", so people tend to come to me to solve the worlds' problems. In this case, a little economic magic goes a long way. Here is my response to the latest email regarding the boycott of ExxonMobile. I won't post the original message here because everyone has already had it sent to them by "that guy in marketing".

A decrease in demand for gas from ExxonMobile would lead to an increase in demand from the other companies. This is quite logical since, according to this plan, people will not use any less gas than before. Since there is no change in production (or, in boring economic terms, there will be no change in supply) that excess demand will have to get filled from somewhere. Gasoline is a commodity, which means there are no distinguishing features from one product to the next. Because gasoline is a commodity, gas companies buy and sell gas to each other as well as to the consumers. So the sales that ExxonMobile loses from the consumers it will only make up in sales to other gas companies. There is no such thing as a price war in a commodity market.

If anyone knows this “Phillip Hallsworth” please let him know that I will be offering Microeconomics on Tuesday and Thursday nights in Leesburg during Summer A. He only needs to show up for my lecture on the economics of oil

CEO's Big Bonus

2006-04-24T17:15:00.000-07:00

I've been lax on my postings...here is a randon Wednesday morning rant:

Lee Raymond received a $400 million retirement package when he stepped down as ExxonMobil’s CEO and Chair. I say “good for him!!” As the Chair/CEO it is his job to maximize the wealth of the owners (stockholders) and he did just that. During his 12 year tenure as Chairman of the Board of Directors he created the largest oil company in the world. Last year he earned ExxonMobile $36 billion in profits. He deserves the $400 million…he did what he was supposed to do…he earned it!!!!

On Wal-Mart and Gasoline

2005-12-09T09:02:00.000-08:00

What does it mean to do something voluntarily? The dictionary defines it as, “Done or undertaken of one's own free will.” In a free society it is assumed that most of what we do is done under our own free will. Maybe I am too much of an optimist, but I believe that when people make decisions for themselves they make the best decisions possible with the information that they have. They also make these decisions VOLUNTARILY. These voluntary decisions also include the exchange of goods, services, money, and time. There is a basic tenet in economics that when people engage in voluntary exchange both parties benefit. Here is a basic example: I was having dinner with a friend the other night. When our salads arrived I was dismayed to see that mine had onions. I have onions. My dinner partner was also displeased; her salad had tomatoes. She hates tomatoes. Luck was with us that night because I happen to love tomatoes and she happens to love onions. So we did what any rational person would do, we VOLUNTARILY traded. I gave her my onions and she gave me her tomatoes. We now both had salads that were more valuable than before. You could say that because of this VOLUNTARY trade we were both better off. We were both wealthier.
People will engage in VOLUNTARY trade if the exchange will lead to a benefit. Sam Walton understood this concept and parlayed it into one of the most successful businesses in the world. Unfortunately not many people fully understand this concept and we all know that people fear what they don’t understand. Wal-Mart is one of the most successful businesses in the world for the simple fact that people prefer to pay less for goods and services when given a choice. People will VOLUNTARILY shop at Wal-Mart because they benefit from that trade. In fact, people VOLUNTARILY spent nearly $260 billion there in 2005. There is an unfortunate disdain towards big business in the United States and Wal-Mart is the quintessential embodiment of that disdain. We constantly hear how Wal-Mart destroys communities by closing small businesses. Wal-Mart doesn’t close businesses, people who VOLUNTARILY choose to shop at Wal-Mart close businesses. We also hear about the low pay and horrid working conditions at Wal-Mart. Despite these sentiments, there are still 1.6 million people worldwide who VOLUNTARILY apply, interview, and work at Wal-Mart. That means that all of these people are VOLUNTARILY exchanging their time for money.
When you fill your car’s gas tank up you are engaging in a VOLUNTARY exchange. You are telling the gas station that I value your gasoline more than I value my money. Think back to the onions and tomatoes example; if you valued your money more than the gas then you wouldn’t engage in that VOLUNATRY exchange. Unfortunately recent increase in gas prices (and subsequent decline) has made people quite upset about this VOLUNTARY exchange. What people are failing to see, however, is that they can VOLUNTARILY cease their gas purchases if they feel that they do not benefit from the exchange. Of course you can argue that gas is a necessity and you need it to do just about anything. My commute to work is 30 miles, so I would have to agree. However, despite the current price, gas is still the cheapest alternative for most people. The only thing that has changed is that the cheapest alternative just got more expensive. If there were a cheaper alternative then people would VOLUNTARILY choose that alternative. So despite the increase in gas prices, people are still benefiting from the VOLUNTARY exchange.
We elect politicians when we VOLUNTARILY vote, just like we control Wal-Mart’s size when we VOLUNTARILY shop there, and we control gas prices when we VOLUNTARILY purchase gas. Like it or not, that is how the free market works.

My Favorite Topic

2005-10-24T17:54:00.000-07:00

So the National Education Association (www.nea.org) has decided to wage war against Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart bashing is clearly the "in thing" to do, so it just fits into place that the NEA would jump right in. You can read more about this campaign at http://www.nea.org/topics/walmart.html. Now I have no problem with an organization supporting a cause. I fully support people's First Amendment right to openly voice their opinions. I especially support this right when it is a view that I strongly oppose. The First Amendment was designed to protect speech that HAS opposing viewpoints. My problem with the NEA supporting this cause is the fact that they represent education in America and yet they insist on presenting a one-sided arguement. Instead of supporting education by presenting people with facts and facilitating an intellectual discussion, the NEA is indoctrining anti-capitalist dogma into the world of education. Here is a copy of the email that I sent to them. I sincerely hope that I hear something back:

Is the NEA trying to EDUCATE people about Wal-Mart or are they trying to INDOCTRINATE people about Wal-Mart? I think that the goal of education should be to create a society of free thinkers who are able to sort through facts and fictions and make their own judgements. It has been quite a challenge for me as an educator to attampt to deprogram students who come through my classroom looking for an education. Wal-Mart makes for an excellent case study in capitalism. Perhaps the NEA should consider taking a neutral stance on Wal-Marts activities and present both sides of the story. Education should be facilitated, not dictated.

I look forward to your reply and I thank you for your time.

A Form Letter

2005-09-23T09:39:00.000-07:00

So the Dept of Energy finally responded to my email. If you read my original letter and the response you can see the deep irony in the form letter that they sent. Here it is:
Dear Sir/Madame:

Thank you for contacting me regarding gasoline prices in the wake of Hurricane Katrina. I want to assure you that this Administration – from the President down – shares your concern, and we have taken aggressive steps to ensure American consumers have the fuel they need.

As you know, Hurricane Katrina resulted in the suspension of most domestic oil production and refining in the central Gulf region. Coupled with increasing demand for oil overseas, over the past months American consumers have experienced a price spike as a result of tighter supplies.

In order to quickly address this situation:

I authorized loans of oil to refiners from our Nation’s Strategic Petroleum Reserve to ensure that gasoline refiners have the supplies necessary to continue production and keep gas stations stocked;

President Bush took the historic step of directing me to sell oil from the Strategic Petroleum Reserve, in coordination with sales by the other 25 member countries of the International Energy Agency;

The Department of Energy worked in close coordination with the Department of Homeland Security, the Environmental Protection Agency, and the Department of Transportation to waive regulations that would impede the efficient flow of gasoline and other products to first responders and markets experiencing shortages.

The Department of Energy is also taking action to protect consumers from price gouging. While our hope is that all Americans would come together in this time of national tragedy, we recognize that some may seek to take advantage of this situation. If you, or someone you know, believe you have experienced price gouging, I encourage you to register a complaint by telephone (1-800-244-3301) or online at www.energy.gov.

All complaints will be forwarded to the Department of Justice, Federal Trade Commission, and the State Attorneys General for investigation, and, where appropriate, prosecution.

Quote of the week/month/year

2005-09-19T21:36:00.000-07:00

I try to express ideas about the free market in as simple terms as possible (that's also the only way to get published in the Orlando Sentinel). Here is the best way that I have come up with to summarize the dangers of price controls during the hurricane season:
"Protecting people from "greed" by outlawing price increases is like protecting people from obesity by outlawing gravity."

Do you think Readers' Digest would print that one?

Car Wash Fundraiser

2005-09-11T20:09:00.000-07:00

On my early morning Sunday training ride through Suburbia, USA I noticed an all too familiar sight; nearly every gas station I passed was hosting a charity car wash. No doubt that the greater than ordinary occurances of these events was due to hurricane Katrina. Of the 4 car washes that I remember seeing 3 of them were "charging" $5 per car and the forth was just asking for donations. This variation in pricing strategy leads to the question: IS ONE PRICING STRATEGY MORE EFFECTIVE THAN ANOTHER FOR CHARITY CAR WASHES? I am assuming that each group is trying to maximize the amount of money raised. I am also assuming (for the sake of this question) that the 2 strategies that can be chosen are either a set price strategy or an open price strategy. So what do you think, do you set a price or do you let the customer decide?

My theory (based on price theory and auction theory) is that it doesn't matter; you will earn the same amount regardless of your pricing strategy. It makes sense in my head (quite the scary place) I am just trying to figure out how to explain the concept.

DOE Letter

2005-09-03T19:17:00.000-07:00

Dear Department of Energy,

I would like to report a possible episode of price gouging. I would use the Gas Price Watch Reporting Form (http://gaswatch.energy.gov) that you have conveniently provided a link for on your homepage, but my situation is a bit too complex to fit in the “300 character limit” box. Besides, this complaint is not about gas prices. I believe that you, as a government organization, may be the victim of price gouging. As a taxpayer, I am asking for your full cooperation in this sensitive matter. I want to ensure that you have not been victimized into spending an unfair amount of the money that I provided you in April of this year. I believe that your very own employees might be engaged in the despicable act of price gouging. There is a strong possibility that many of your employees are unfairly profiting from the money that you are forced to pay to them. You can, of course, determine if this atrocity is occurring by simply comparing the amount that they are charging you for their labor to the amount of their expenses. If there is an “unfair” disparity between the two then the price that you pay for the employee’s labor should be immediately lowered. After all, these are tough times and we want to be fair to everybody. There is no room for unfair profiteering. Since justification of prices is such a subjective matter, I will be more than happy to help in any way that I can. I will ensure that no one is using any of their unfairly accrued profits to save for the future, or to invest in own human capital, or to invest in their families. If we work together I am positive that we can relinquish this matter in a timely fashion.

Thank you for your concern.
Adam Gifford
Economics Instructor
Lake-Sumter Community College

Be Thankful for High Prices

2005-09-01T04:11:00.000-07:00

PRICES PREVENT SHORTAGES. Gas prices have been increasing at a faster rate than most people have ever seen. We are about to hit a new national record. The highest price of gas that the nation has ever seen (adjusted for inflation) is an average of $2.91 per gallon in 1979. I paid $2.89 this morning. Even though the high prices are a common topic of complaint from water coolers to radio DJ's (who are making this country dumber by the minute) these prices are preventing something much worse. High prices are preventing gas shortages. A shortage is a very specific occurance where supply is unable to meet demand. This is regulated by prices. High prices lower demand and create incentives to increase supply. Unfortunately many people (including the mind numbing morning DJs) are under the impression that we are experiencing a gas shortage. What we are experiencing is a decreased supply; NOT a shortage. We WILL experience a shortage if prices are not allowed to continue to rise. We saw this in 1979 when Carter put a price ceiling on gas prices. We also saw this last year when economically ignorant Florida laws put a price ceiling on gas prices during and after our four hurricanes. So be grateful that prices are increasing; your alternative is an empty gas tank.

FEMA Phone Call

2005-08-25T13:14:00.000-07:00

So about 3 weeks ago I sent a letter to FEMA (printed in a previous post) asking them to stop sending us money after hurricanes. Well, they called me at my office today. I hate talking on the phone, so I let them leave a message. I am pondering on whether or not I shold call them back. The letter was probably forwarded to their "Disgruntled Retiree With a Lot of Free Time" department. I am thinking that if I call them back the conversation could go one of three ways:

1. Thank you for your concern, Mr. Gifford, your request has been noted and we will consider your comments if time permits.

2. Thank you for your concern, Mr. Gifford, we now realize your superior level of intellect and we would like to offer you the position of Grand High Exhaulted Mystic Ruler of FEMA.

3. Thank you for your concern, Mr. Gifford, thanks to The Patriot Act your name is now on a governemnt watch list and your phone and email are being closely monitored.

4. Thank you for your concern, Mr. Gifford, we now realize and fear your superior level of intellect so we have requested that Pat Robertson add you to his assassination list.

I will ponder the thought of retunring the call and keep everyone informed.

I don't wanna get fired

2005-08-19T08:18:00.000-07:00

I have just entered my third year as a Florida resident and my second year teaching at a state funded educational institution. Because of these two facts I have decided that this would be my year to start getting involved with state and federal politics. My excitement about this new venture was so profound that I could hardly contain myself. The first step on my journey was to exercise my right as a citizen and write to Congress regarding some of the maladies that I have seen with our government. My first written correspondence outlined my disdain for the increased Florida minimum wage and summarized the negative impacts that such a price control can exude on our economy. I decided to run the letter through my letter and purge any evidence form my laptop lest I suffer the same fate as Jan Hall. After all, it could be said that my view on the minimum wage are discriminatory against the younger students in my class who are working at lower paying jobs. I love my job, so I didn’t want to see a suspension in my future. After some thinking I went through and eliminated all traces of the other letters I was going to send as well. I don’t think FEMA should send any relief money to Florida, but if I sent that letter I would be discriminating any of my students who have lived through a hurricane. My third letter surly would have sent me hurdling towards unemployment because its contents showed my outward resistance to post-hurricane price controls. That letter would have discriminated against ALL of my students. So I guess I’ll just give up on this who politics and free speech thing and stick to activities that won’t threaten my career like passive-aggressive mumbling in a dark room.

Adam Gifford
Economics Instructor
Lake-Sumter Community College

Bud Light Presents...

2005-08-15T16:45:00.000-07:00

So it has been a while since I said anything bad about the MBA program at Rollins. Here is something that I wrote during my last semester of the "accelerated" program. Mind you that I had time to write this WHILE I was taking 4 classes and WHILE I was teaching 3 classes and WHILE I was working on a freelance writing project and WHILE I was able to make it out to the pool everyday to work on my grad school tan. If you are not familiar with the Bud Light Real Men of Genius commercials then this will make no sense to you at all...

Bud Light Presents: Real Men of Genius
(real men of genius)
Today we salute you, Mr. Non-challenging MBA Professor
(Mr. Non-challenging MBA Professor)
You teach us what we need to know…the cost drivers for the ferrets living at Miskatonic University (Barbarian Sword!)
Some students can valuate a company, some can barely determine operating income...that’s OK though, they’ll all get 97.5 on their project.
(Half way between 95 and 100!)
The competition is fierce, but you can handle it. Up against the likes of Nova Southeastern, University of Phoenix, and Guam College...what have they got that you don’t…online courses.
(I thank God for the Internet!)
So crack open an ice-cold Bud Light, Earl of Unemployment. You put the “B” in MBA…and the “umm” back in Crummer.
(Mr. Non-challenging MBA Professor)

2005-08-06T10:24:00.000-07:00

So the Orlando Sentinel wouldnt print my letter to FEMA unless I readdressed it as a letter to the editor. I guess that sarcasm is a bit too high brow for their readership. Maybe I should have just drawn pictures to make my point.

My Letter to FEMA

2005-08-04T13:33:00.000-07:00

I sent this to the Sentinel today...let's see if they put it to print.

Dear FEMA,

I am writing to formally request that you eliminate any plans to send funds to the residents of Florida after this year’s imminent hurricane season. Please consider this a request for all future years as well. I would like to purchase a home here in central Florida and I am unable to purchase one that is to my liking. I am a teacher, and although my salary is quite generous (despite what most of us would have the public believe) it is still not enough to afford the home that is to my liking. One of the main reasons that the prices of these homes are so high is because you insist on using tax-payer money to subsidize the risk of living in Florida. Basically, you make living through hurricanes easy for us by using other people’s money. My parents who live up in Pennsylvania subsidized my housing for the first 22 years of my like; I really don’t think that it’s fair to make them continue this subsidy through their federal taxes. You see, if we Floridians were forced to bear the full burden of our choice to live in a hurricane ravished part of the country then fewer of us would stay. If fewer of us would stay (and even fewer would want to move here) then, of course, the demand for housing would decrease and so would the price. Please help me to live out the American dream and purchase a home of my own.

Thank you,
Adam Gifford
Economics Instructor
Lake-Sumter Community College

2005-06-07T12:36:00.000-07:00

This was posted in the 4 June 2005 issue of the Orlando Sentinel. The question that was posed was: What have you been doing to prepare for this years hurricane season? Since I didn't want to give the obligatory response of "stockpiling batterys and booze" I decided to voice my opinion.

Since September of last year I have been busy teaching my students about the dangers of price controls. I have been meticulous in ensuring that they understand what happens when prices are not allowed to rise with demand. I am doing this in hopes that maybe; just maybe, we will finally get to see the power of a free market. Maybe this year we will get to see a more effective distribution of products based on a subjective value that reflects that represents current events rather than an objective price that was set in the past. Maybe this year we will be free from government mandated product shortages that are masked under the guise of “price controls that protect the consumer”.

Adam Gifford
Economics Instructor
Lake-Sumter Community College

Quit Your Bitchin!!!

2005-03-10T09:44:00.000-08:00

I can't stand people who whine when they are faced with a challenge. There has been more whining in the news about the FCAT then there was about the hurricanes last year. I love the idea of the FCAT. We need to weed out the people who can't deal with the little blessings of stress that life presents. if I had to buckle down and pass the FCAT when I was in high school then maybe I wouldn't have taken a whole 5 years to breeze through my undergrad experience. Damn sissies...suck it up!!!!! I submitted the following, less bitter, rant to the Orlando Sentinel today. That trash rag better start printing more of my shit!!!!

Do you want to be protected by law enforcement officers who are able to perform well in stressful situations? Do you want to be sure that your surgeon won’t lose her cool if something goes wrong in the operating room? The rational answer is an unopposed “yes”. So why then do we have all of this negative hype regarding the FCAT? The FCAT is an excellent tool for testing a student’s ability to deal with a stressful situation. They must complete a difficult challenge with limited resources in a limited amount of time. That sure sounds like environment that nearly every person in this country deals with on a daily basis. Nearly every career that requires any kind of education will involve high stress situations. Students need to learn to deal with stress just as much as they need to know math, science, history, and English. If you can’t deal with stressful situations then maybe you are not ready to leave school. The FCAT is a step in the right direction.

Voting Rant

2005-03-05T18:39:00.000-08:00

I love Suze Orman, but she needs to stick with financial advising and stay away from economics and politics:

I just finished watching Suze Orman on PBS. I definitely enjoy watching her speak and I think that the advice that she dispenses is priceless. She is truly an amazing financial advisor. She did mention something in her program, however, that I strongly disagree with. When answering an audience member’s question regarding the future of Social Security, she delivered a rant about young people needing to get involved in politics and the government. The general gist of her rant was that if you don’t vote then you cannot criticize the system. This judgmental, self-righteous attitude fuels the “vote for the sake of voting” fire. Is voting the only political activity that gives you the right to criticize the government? Let’s examine the argument that people who vote are more involved in the election decisions than people who do not vote and are therefore “allowed” to criticize government activities. If we apply this logic to everyone, then the only people who should be able to criticize the government are the people who are most involved in the election process. That means that people who vote get shouldn’t say anything because there are people who vote AND volunteer their time. Those people shouldn’t say anything because there are also people who vote AND volunteer their time AND donate their money. Of course those people shouldn’t say anything because there are people who vote AND volunteer their time AND donate their money AND put stickers on their car. This logical reasoning now limits the amount of people who can criticize the government to a few individuals who have dedicated their lives, their fortunes, and their votes to the election process.
Voting is simply one of many activities that you can take part in that allows you to get involved with the election process. Why should that single activity be any different than any other activity? I have been eligible to vote for the past 12 years and I have never even bothered to register; yet I still take the time to educate myself on government activities. I also take the time to discuss these activities with my students inside and outside of the classroom so that they can make informed voting decisions if they choose to vote.
So the next time you decide to criticize someone for not voting, remember that there is someone out there who has done more than you yet has refrained from judging you for your lack of actions.

Magnet Rant

2005-03-03T11:27:00.000-08:00

This was published in the March 6th copy of the Orlando Sentinel:

Do you congratulate yourself when your heart beats? Do you brag to others every time you breathe? Of course you don’t. Those actions would be considered self-righteous. Then why do you insist on placing that magnet on your back bumper that show the world that you support the troops? Of course you support the troops…EVERYONE supports the troops regardless of their stance on the war. This is no longer Vietnam; there is no question as to peoples’ feelings about the brave men and women who serve in our military. Supporting the troops is like breathing, it just happens. Your car magnet only shows that you support magnet companies the same way that an Abercrombie & Fitch shirt shows that the wearer supports (through their purchase) Abercrombie & Fitch. If you want to show support for the troops then show it through your actions, not through your self-righteous display of vehicle accent pieces. There are dozens of programs that allow you to donate time, money, and compassion to our troops. Find one that you like and I guarantee that your neighbors and your fellow drivers will be much more impressed.

My 25-Cents

2005-02-23T09:48:00.000-08:00

The Orlando Sentinel, trash rag that it is, has a feature every week called Friday Forum. This is part of their OP-ED section where they ask a question and let the mouth-breathing members of the general public voice their opinion. I decided I need to join these ranks since I can't really publish anywhere else. The question that they asked was:

How would you like to see the state spend $4.5 billion in extra cash it expects in its treasury after a sizzling real-estate market and rebuilding after last year’s hurricanes?

My response:

It is economic blasphemy to think that hurricane repairs cause the state coffers to have “extra” cash. Sure the increase in work saw an increase in tax revenues, but we are failing to see the other half of the story. We aren’t looking at the alternative uses of that money that was spent on repairs. We aren’t seeing the employee that could have been hired, the store that could have been opened, the weekend trip that could have been taken, or the IRA that could have been increased. Keep in mind that an increase in consumption of repair services must also be accompanied by a decrease in consumption of everything else. If you don’t believe that then get together with your neighbors and destroy the windows and roofs in your own neighborhood…the state could use the “extra” cash.

Florida's Tax Changes

2005-02-23T08:37:00.000-08:00

I was asked to write some comments on Florida's tax change proposals for 2005. Here are my ramblings:

Comments on Florida’s Budget Proposal

Cutting Taxes
One of the biggest misunderstandings of tax cuts is the difference between a reduction in the tax rate and a reduction in tax revenue. Some definitions are in order here before we continue. A tax rate is the percentage rate at which a particular activity is taxed. The tax revenue is the actual amount of money that is generated from the tax on a particular activity. This is a very important distinction because the only thing that a legislator has control over is the tax rate, NOT the tax revenue. When you change the tax rate you also get a change in peoples’ spending and saving behaviors. This change in behavior will also change the amount of tax revenue that is generated. The change in tax revenue that is caused by a change in the tax rate is never fully known until the end of the year when all of the tax has been collected. Any tax revenue numbers that are reported before then are estimations. A decrease in the tax rate can either cause a decrease or an increase in the tax revenue. Just the same, an increase in the tax rate can cause an increase or a decrease in the tax revenue. Here is a possible (and very simplified) example:

The Florida sales tax is raised from 7% to 70%. It could be said that because the tax rate increased tenfold then the tax revenue should also increase tenfold. The reality is that peoples’ spending habits will change to avoid the new tax as much as possible. People will buy less, or they will make more tax-free purchases (Internet purchases), or they will leave Florida for a state with more affordable taxes, etc. In this case it is highly likely that an increase in taxes will lead to a decrease in sales tax revenue because there will be less taxable purchases.

So when we see numbers in the news that say “there will be a $300 million tax cut” those numbers are estimates, but we will never know for sure about the actual change in tax revenue until the end of the year when all funds have been collected.

Impact on Students
One of the proposed revenue increases is a 7.5% increase in the tuition for state school tuition. 7.5% sounds life quite a large increase especially when inflation last year only hovered around 2%. The actual amount that tuition will be increased is only about $224 per year. This number was determined by figuring what a 7.5% increase in UCF’s tuition (not fees) would be for next year. Students can easily offset this tuition increase by taking advantage of the back-to-school 9-day sales tax break by making most of their purchases during this time. Another way that students can offset this increase is to increase their consumption of alcohol and take advantage of the tax repeal on alcohol served at restaurants and bars (a little economic humor there).

Tax Cuts for the “Rich”
When we read about tax cuts for the “rich” we are reading a politically slanted statement generally made by a bias media. The statement “tax cuts for the rich” would look very different if a non-politically biased economist wrote it. The statement would look more like “tax rate reduction implemented on a specific segment of the population in order to stimulate a specific economic action”. It sounds quite bland and probably wouldn’t look very flashy on the cover of the Orlando Sentinel, but we need to look at the reasons for tax cuts through objective economic eyes, not bias political eyes. A reduction in a tax rate will always impact different people in different ways. Some will see the benefit of the change and some will not. The same can be said for the change in government spending. Some will see the benefit of the change and some will not.

Let’s look at the specific tax rate change that was proposed. The proposal was to reduce, by half, the state tax on stocks and bonds owned by investors. Currently, individuals and businesses pay this tax only if they have more than $310,000 of such investments. Married couples pay this tax if they have more than $560,000 of such investments. The term “rich” is quite a subjective term and in this case “rich” would be people who fall into the category of owning stocks and bonds over the said amount. So, then, what possible economic activities could be rewarded from this tax cut? Listed below are some of the POSSIBLE effects:
· A lower tax burden could lead to increased spending because there is more money “in pocket” to spend.
· A lower tax burden could lead to increased saving since there is more money “in pocket” to save.
· A lower tax burden could lead to more investing in stocks and bonds because it is now more profitable to invest in stocks and bonds.

Generally the people who are against tax cuts for the “rich” are the people who do not directly benefit from the tax rate decrease. In this case it is anyone who does not own at least $310,000 in stocks and bonds. Keep in mind that IN GENERAL people accumulate wealth as they progress in life. So the people who do not benefit from this specific tax rate decrease right now will most likely benefit from it in the future. It is a very common financial strategy for retirees to put most of their retirement investment in interest bearing bonds and low risk stocks and, although it sounds like a tremendous amount of money right now, $310,000 is not that much money to survive on if you are retired. Most people (especially students) will need much more than that to sustain their lifestyle when they retire.

The Greatest Game in the World

2005-02-22T20:33:00.000-08:00

Graduate level business education can be an ardious task (well....not really). Just like any other "grown-ups" people in the Rollins College AMBA 8 program got sick of each other. We decided that there was a need to quantify the moronic behavior that was ever so prevalent among our classmates. So was born unto the Earth...Fantasy AMBA. The concept was brillant!!! The gane worked just like Fantasy Football. You picked players (classmates in our case) and each of those players earned you points based on their actions (or quirks in our case). I am not going to mention any names, but here are the official actions that earned you points. I would post the scoring spreadsheet, but it was so in depth that I might crash this site. The formatting was a bit ruined in translation, but you can figure it out on your own.

BYLAWS FOR AMBA FANTASY LEAGUE – CONSTITUTION OF POINTS

POINT EARNING ACTION OFFICIAL EXPLANATION
Comments with no relevance to discussion The speaking-just-to-speak rule. Includes any comments that do not make a significant addition to the learning experience. Also referred to as the “My cat’s name is Mittens” clause.
Crying There must be actual tears. Lip quivering, flush face, and excessive blinking have been deemed unacceptable and will not earn any points. Points will be earned if subject leaves the room to cry (must be witnessed by at least 2 people).
Shouting The voice must be raised above standard conversational tone and be used to convey anger, disgust or hatred.
Embarrassing/Personal stories This includes anything stories that should only surface after a long night of drinking. This also includes any stories that reveal nicknames revolving around the poultry industry.
Sucking up Includes not only obvious compliments to an individual, but starting any controversial sentence with “I just want to start by saying that I thing this class/article/topic is important…”.
Offending individual The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets another individual and has not been made in a joking manner.
Offending entire demographic group The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets any demographic group who share similar characteristics (see Kotler’s book Marketing Management for a detailed definition of “demographic”).
Offending 50% of class The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets at least 18 students but not more than 30 (see below).
Offending entire class The utterance of any comment in class that visibly upsets at least 31 people in class.
Fisticuffs in class Points will be awarded for any attempt at physical harm towards another person as defined by the tort of assault. (Note: the generic definition for assault will be used in this case and NOT assault as defined by Florida state law). Assault is defined as the threat of immediate harm or offensive contact or any action that arouses reasonable apprehension of imminent harm; actual physical contact is unnecessary (Cheeseman, Business Law, 2001, Prentice hall)
Fisticuffs outside of class See above-the only difference is that this must occur outside the threshold of the assigned classroom.
Nit-picking Any comments that do not add value to the educational experience and have not yet been mentioned.
Summarizing or adding to someone else’s point We already heard it once, it probably wasn’t worthwhile to begin with, we definitely don’t need it repeated or summarized.
Any reference to CRM/Germany/repetitive point We are here to acquire a plethora of skills and knowledge, hearing repetitive stories does not add to the educational experience.
Reply all OK, there were rules laid out in the middle of the summer. Stick to the rules and no one gets any points.
Brown stamps See the article on Transactional Analysis for a full explanation – at least you can apply something you learned.
Body odor This is Florida, there is PLENTY of water for everyone…USE IT! We are all adults here, hopefully no one will get points for this.
Bad breath See above.
Excessive body language Points will be awarded only for body language that is excessive beyond what is culturally acceptable for the person using the body language (so as not to discriminate).
Inability to convey point If no one can really understand what the hell you are trying to say (note: no points will be awarded for miscommunication/misunderstandings due to language barriers).
Professor “moves on” Points will be awarded when the professor does not even acknowledge the drivel that is being spewed from the offender’s mouth.
Professor is visibly confused Same as above except the professor takes the time to ask what the hell the person was trying to say.
Every question after the second in the same class Do the math – 37 students, 2 questions each…that’s a lot. Limit the questions to 2 per person. Anymore than 2 entails either sucking up or plain stupidity.
Cell phone rings in class Points are only awarded if the phone rings during the scheduled hours of the class (before and after don’t count). Points will also be awarded if people can still hear the phone vibrate.
Obvious stupidity Any comments that make us dumber after we hear them.
Spontaneous outbursts of profanity At least one of the seven original curse words (as defined by George Carlin) must be clearly stated.
Overused taglines What’s going on? Enough said.
Obvious poor fashion Must go beyond wrinkles and stains. The class fashion consultants (Kat and Christa) will make the official calls.
Late for class More than 5 minutes to earn any points.
Audible random noises Includes mumbling, laugh-grunting, desk smacking, and any other non-word noises.

Rollins College MBA International Study Trip

2005-02-22T20:27:00.000-08:00

Part of the curriculum at the Rollins College MBA program is an international study trip. This trip is used as a cornerstone of the school's marketing campaign. Here is the truth behind the glitz...

INTRODUCTION
Webster’s Ninth New Collegiate Dictionary (1985) defines the word “propaganda” as “the spreading of ideas, information, or rumor for the purpose of helping or injuring an institution, a cause, or a person.” I was able to witness the power of propaganda from the time I first heard of our international study trip in June until the time I returned from the trip in January. There were three major subjects of propaganda that I witnessed. These sources were:
• Propaganda about the trip.
• Propaganda about London and England.
• Propaganda about Dublin and Ireland.
These subjects are discussed in more detail throughout the next three sections of this paper.

PROPAGANDA ABOUT THE TRIP
It is not difficult to imagine my excitement when I discovered that the MBA program that I was accepted to included an overseas business study trip as a part of the curriculum. The trip was described so well in the Crummer Graduate School of Business general catalog that is given to all prospective students. The description reads:
“You’ll have the rare opportunity to meet one-on-one with high-ranking executives of premier multinational corporations in countries such as, England, Belgium, Germany, Czech Republic, and Hong Kong. On recent International Study Trips, students have visited the headquarters of BMW (Munich), met with senior managers at Morgan Stanley Dean Witter (London), and attended a private briefing with a member of the European Parliament (Brussels).”

My excitement mounted as the months passed. All I could think of was “meet one-on-one with high-ranking executives” and “senior managers at Morgan Stanley Dean Witter” and “a private briefing with a member of the European Parliament”. Now I fully understood that our trip would not match the list of highlights from years past, but I did assume that a school as progressive as Crummer would surely execute continuous improvement to all of their programs, and our trip would be the best trip ever. I was ecstatic on the day we finally left for the trip. I could hardly wait to dig in to this engorgement of international business learning.

Seven days later I had a whole different view of this “learning” experience.

The first part of the catalogue description reads, “rare opportunity to meet one-on-one with high-ranking executives…”. Our first outing was to the Jaguar manufacturing plant that was a brisk 3 hour drive from our hotel. At this point, our “rare opportunity” consisted of a 2-hour tour that is run 8 times per day, 5 days per week, and 50 weeks per year (according to our tour guide). That means that this “rare opportunity” only happens 2000 times per year. The “one-on –one” interaction with “high-ranking executives” consisted of a 10-minute video shown by the receptionist and a 1-hour tour given by a retired assembly line worker. We were also privy to a brief conversation with the Jaguar Gift Shop attendant. The following day we toured Lloyd’s of London. Now Lloyd’s was a bit more of a “rare opportunity” since they only run 2 tours per day. Our “one-on-one” interaction here was actually forty-to-one and it was with a semi-retired insurance salesman who knew a lot about the history of Lloyd’s but not much about our group’s relevant business questions. Later that day we spent a pain staking 2 ½ hours listening to a man named John White drone on about the history of Europe. I preferred that class more when it was called World History 1 and I was in 6th grade. When we finally reached Dublin we went to visit Oracle. Here we were treated to a presentation given to all 80 of us by a mid-level trainer in one of their call centers. Again, this is a far cry from “rare opportunity” or “one-on-one” or “high-ranking executive” or “headquarters of…”.

There were numerous other examples of propaganda throughout this entire trip, but these were the most memorable moments .

PROPAGANDA ABOUT LONDON AND ENGLAND
The great English writer, Samuel Johnson, once wrote, “Why, Sir, you find no man, at all intellectual, who is willing to leave London. No, Sir, when a man is tired of London, he is tired of life; for there is in London all that life can afford.” (http://www.samueljohnson.com/london.html 3/7/04). Let us examine this quote and how it pertains to the international study trip.

I would consider our MBA class to be mostly classified as “intellectual”. I can also name about 25 students who could not wait to leave London. The London leg of our trip started out with a 3 hour tour of London which was actually a 2 hour trip INTO London followed by a 1 hour tour of the city. The first 2 hours consisted of a long highway drive made even longer by a tour guide who felt that it was her duty to enlighten us with her personal social commentary. Ten hours of travel followed by 2 hours of non-value added time…we were intellectuals who were already sick of London.

The next three days were filled with dirty tube rides, smoke filled bars and restaurants, rude locals, and overpriced food. The Tube is the main form of transportation, and despite its ease of use, it still requires you to stand shoulder to shoulder with the local hooligans who can’t afford cab fare. You are also forced to hold on to greasy handrails that are covered in so much hand funk that they resemble an old Petri dish. My dry cleaning bill was a fortune when I returned home because of the smell of smoke that was entrenched in all of my clothes. Who ever said that Americans are the unhealthiest people obviously never spent time in London. Smoking seems to be the national pastime in London. None of the locals look at you…most don’t even acknowledge your presence. They walk around the streets with their heads hung low like the Deltas from a scene in Huxley’s Brave New World. Yes, after a few days we were tired of London…according to Samuel Johnson, we also must have been “tired of life.”

The final part of Johnson’s quote states that, “there is in London all that life can afford.” He must not have been thinking of the food. The food in London is overpriced and under seasoned. The vegetables are as grey as the noon sky and the prices are astronomical. Luckily we discovered the made-to-eat sandwiched that are sold in most convenient stores. For about $6 you could get some bread with a few veggies and some mayo. They weren’t very tasty, but they were affordable. They were all that my life could afford.

PROPAGANDA ABOUT DUBLIN AND IRELAND
After researching numerous websites about Dublin and Ireland, I came to one with a particular slogan that really struck a sour note with me. The caption on the homepage for tourism in Ireland read, “There’s something of Ireland in all of us,” (http://www.shamrock.org/flash.html 3/6/04). A more accurate slogan would read “There’s something of ours in Ireland.” During the 3 days that I spent in Dublin I saw more things get stolen that I ever had in my previous 29 years on this planet. Our laundry list of stolen items (that was reported) included:
• 1 brand new cell phone
• 1 gold wrist watch
• 300 Euro
• 1 gold pocket watch
• 3 jackets
I was present in a hotel room that had been robbed no more than 1 hour after we had arrived in Dublin. The cunning thief was able to climb into the room through the open window, pilfer what he could, and leave the premises without being detected. Later that evening (after we gathered enough courage to brave the crime ridden streets of Dublin) we had another fellow student get his trench coat and gold pocket watch taken from a pub where there were nearly 25 other students from our group present. Finally, during the second evening, two more students had their jackets stolen…FROM THE HOTEL LOBBY!

Yes, there is definitely something of ours still in Ireland; unless of course everything made its way out of the country on the black market.
EPILOGUE
The propaganda will continue. I have been a personal medium in helping its spread. I volunteer for all of the preview weekends that Crummer hosts for prospective students. I shockingly hear myself describing the trip as “amazing” and “well worth the time”. Hopefully someday this propaganda will become the truth.